When we think about the causes of personal burnout, what usually comes to mind is toxic workplaces, excessive family demands, financial stress, responsibility overload and tough life challenges. And yes. Before I go on, I will say that all of these things can lead to mental and emotional burnout. But it is worth considering how our mindset may be a contributing factor to our own burnout risk. We all know those people who seem to sail through life’s challenges and calmly come out the other end, dust themselves off and optimistically move on with their lives. It is this kind of resilience I used to envy… and still do, to a degree, as I am a work in progress when it comes to shifting my burnout mindset. What is a burnout mindset? Well, as I see it, burnout mindset is composed of internal traits that make external challenges significantly more difficult to navigate… and move on from. As follows: Perfectionism. When we are setting standards that we can barely live up to - let alone anyone around us - and constantly shifting the goal posts of success, the result is an ever-present feeling of being let down by ourselves and others. People-pleasing . I have touched on this in a former post . Suffice it to say that you are not going to please all of the people all of the time. Not everyone you meet is going to like you. Desperately attempting to keep everyone happy is exhausting and that is exactly what you will end up being if you try. Lack of boundaries. Boundaries are the ultimate form of self-care. Without appropriate boundaries  people, our workplaces, family and friends will take advantage of us… and for the most part, they will not even realise they are doing so. You can’t really blame others if you have made being the ‘yes’ person, the person who’ll always be there, step in or pick up the slack, part of your identity. But if you are feeling constantly drained by the demands of others, it’s probably time to consider your boundaries. Overactive inner critic. If your internal voice is criticising your every move you don’t really need that toxic boss, overbearing parent or so-called ‘friend’ to be doing so. Problem is, if they do start bullying you, you’re more likely to believe what they are saying because your own ‘inner bully’ agrees. With an over-active inner critic you are effectively living in a state where you are constantly in fear of doing… and in fear of not doing because the biggest fear is that you will get it wrong. Anxiety-inducing… and, ironically, not the best headspace for making decisions. An inability to move on. Life loads us up with enough stuff in the present. Dragging a motherload of trauma from every bad thing that has ever happened in your life will add an enormous weight on top of whatever it is you are navigating now. Learning to let go is one of the best gifts we can give ourselves. So, there are my thoughts on the burnout mindset. I will be expanding on some of the above points in future posts, but our capacity to make positive changes in ourselves, and our lives, usually begins with awareness. Do a bit of honest reflection and ask yourself if any of the above traits are contributing to your stress levels and have a think about how you can change the narrative. Clare Xxx

Whatever you do in life do it for you. Do what is connected to your own desires. Develop your own interests, dream your own dreams and be yourself.  I spent way too many years of my life making decisions based on how other would perceive me. I wanted to be liked. I was seeking approval - from my parents, my peers, my colleagues, society in general - and I’m not just talking about which shoes to wear with an outfit. Some of these decisions were big and impacted the direction of major areas in my life - such as career, relationships and, ultimately, my wellbeing - for many years to come. And you know what? A lot of these decisions were wrong for me because my focus was more on enhancing myself in the minds of others as opposed to my own.  Life as a people-pleasing machine takes its toll. There is the simple fact that you can’t please all of the people all of the time so you tend to be constantly on the lookout for the next thing or achievement that will impress whichever cohort you believe you are “letting down”. Living like this takes a lot of energy… so much so that you gradually lose touch with your own dreams and desires. Every so often your almost forgotten authentic self might emerge in the chaos of your mind reminding you of things you’d love to do, dreams you once had, only to be repressed with a reprimand to not be ridiculous and the ever-present fear of what others might think. It is an unfulfilling, dispiriting way to exist that eventually takes its toll. For me, that was depression… and one of the many lessons I learnt is that:   Allowing your happiness to rely on the approval of others is like outsourcing your most valuable asset to the most unreliable and unpredictable team in existence. Trying to gain approval of others is like taking appeal pot-shots in the dark because we do not really know what is going on in their minds - their motivations, their traumas, their triggers - and maybe they don’t either. So you may as well learn to be okay with the fact that not everyone is going to like you and get on with following your dreams.  And yes, as humans we are conditioned to want people to like us and be part of “the tribe”. But I have found as I’ve gradually let go of my approval-seeking, people-pleasing side, the more headspace I’ve had to connect with my authentic self, know what makes me happy and make decisions based on that knowledge. Our decisions carve our path in life and when we make life choices that are aligned to our true selves we increasingly encounter people who genuinely resonate with us. Essentially, we find “our tribe”.  Clare xxx

At times we need to focus on on restoring our energetic boundaries. In Yoga our anatomy is not limited to our physical body, it includes our subtle body and our energetic boundaries are the extension of our subtle body beyond the boundary of our physical body.  Through the practice of yoga, especially pranayama and meditation, we gradually gain an awareness of our personal energetic boundary. This boundary is unique to us, however it is far from static and can be influenced by the energetic boundaries of those around us. We have all had the experience of walking into a room where everyone is smiling and outwardly amicable, but the tension is so high you could cut the air like a knife. Cliched, I know, but what you are sensing are other people’s energetic boundaries and, in turn, they are sensing yours. You are essentially bringing your energy into the room and adding it to the mix. From this little analogy we can see why it is important to take care of our energetic boundaries by working on the subtle body from the internal to the external. When our energetic boundaries are in good shape, we are literally putting our good vibes. It has been my personal experience that when my energetic boundaries are in good shape, it is much easier to maintain other types of healthy boundaries; that being the more prosaic kinds that I have described over my last few posts, pertaining to our physical, emotional, intellectual, time, material and mental boundaries. Our subtle body and energetic boundaries influence our capacity with all other boundaries, and, of course, our practical boundaries are what protects our subtle body and energetic boundaries.  When we go through challenging times in life where our energetic boundaries are knocked about a bit, we become tired, unwell, emotionally depleted and less capable of maintaining our practical boundaries, which further depletes our energetic boundaries. Basically, it’s a negative feedback loop.  What do we do when we find ourselves becoming depleted in this way? When my energetic boundaries need a top up, I find one of the best ways is to immerse myself in nature. According to many Eastern Philosophies, all matter living and non-living, is surrounded by an energy. So, on a low-vibe afternoon a few weeks back, I stood by the sea, bare feet on the rocks. I allowed my mind to calm and saw my feet grow roots, extending deep into the earth. I allowed my energy to expand out from my body becoming at one with the beautiful surrounds and was nourished in return, breathing in the smell of the ocean, the foliage and sea life. As I eventually drew my energetic boundaries back towards myself they bought with them the ancient energy of the sea and earth. As I retraced my footsteps along the beach I felt calm, clear and energised. I had literally raised my vibration.  Journaling exercise: Reflect on a place in nature that restores you energetic boundaries. Using free-flow writing capture the scenery, the smells, the textures… the everything. You might also like to create an intention around spending time in this place when you need to. Maybe take it a step further and create a personal meditation to support you in connecting  with this place and replenishing your energy from your surrounds.  Clare xxx

To say I’ve had a problematic relationship with my mind and body over the years is somewhat of an understatement. My teens were dominated by depression, anxiety and an eating disorder. Through very limited caloric intake and excessive exercise, I would keep myself as thin as I possibly could. A behaviour that fuelled feelings of control over myself, and by extension, my life. In reality I had control of neither.   As a university student I realised I could subsist on cheap meals from the Student Union and snacks, supplemented with alcoholic beverages, and still have loads of energy and look pretty good. Late nights, a packet of chips for dinner, exercise distinctly on a ‘if I’m in the mood’ basis. I didn’t gain weight on this standard student lifestyle plan and came to the conclusion that I must be ‘naturally skinny’. I think the food group I was cutting out was nutrients. Frankly, my current health-obsessed self cringes in hindsight. My 30s weren’t much better. I was working full-time, studying a postgraduate degree at night for which I spent most of my weekends doing the assignments. Admittedly, I was doing a lot, but suffice it to say my time and stress management skills were poor. I existed on takeaway, relieved stress with a wine or four, spent most of my time sitting on my bum and was rather alarmed when said bum started to expand. In fact, I was so shocked that I took myself off to my GP to have my thyroid checked. After all, I identified as a ‘skinny person’, this was not supposed to happen. After a good talking to from my GP, I finally accepted that my ‘naturally skinny’ days were behind me. That said, as nutrition didn’t feature highly in my 20s it’s quite possible I was never naturally skinny anyway.  Somewhere in my early 30s I realised that I was going to have to actually work on my wellness. The problem of course, is that change is hard. I would join gyms, start walking routines, try to limit unhealthy food and cut back on the wine only to fall off the wagon - oddly this would often happen right at the time I was starting to see some results. Whatever gains I had made would disappear along with my self-esteem, I was trapped in a cycle of bursts of motivation  that would collapse at the first sign of stress and I’d be consumed with anger and disappointment in myself; pass me the wine and a giant pizza, already! At age 35 I experienced an extremely traumatic event that had a toxic knock-on effect into all areas of my life for approximately the next seven years. I lost my job, my career and my marriage. These losses compounded my trauma and my "trauma mind" made bad decisions, I experienced an abusive relationship, financial instability and my "self-care" practices evaporated with my sense of self-worth. As I emerged from this dark time, my mental wellness and my recovery from trauma and depression had to be my focus by necessity. I am forever grateful for some of the wonderful health professionals who worked with me and the anti-depressant medication I was on at the time that probably saved my life. If anything, this time served to emphasise the value of healthy lifestyle practices, however as I recovered my mental wellness, when it came to lifestyle practices I found myself falling back into my old cycle of periods motivation followed by apathy. There had to be a better way.  So how did I escape this roller coaster and find balance? I have to be honest and say that it was certainly not a ‘great flash of insight overnight shift’ sort of thing and it took me until my early 40s to really start to figure out the wellness practices that worked for me. It was, however, lots of small insights and shifts and it went something like this: I didn’t lose sight of my wellness goals. Even during my less healthy phases I had a clear image of how I wanted myself, and my life, to be.  Because I didn’t lose sight of my goals, I didn’t give up. Yes, I’d fall off the wellness horse for a while, but I’d always dust myself off eventually and try again.  One of my game changers was yoga. I have done yoga to maintain flexibility throughout my adult life, but at age 40 I discovered a yoga studio that taught strong vinyasa yoga - a style I’d (somehow) never come across before. My first class was so tough I think I actually crawled out, but I’d discovered two things: That yoga can be a serious workout.. and it was a workout I loved to do.  I think I quit my gym membership about a week later to focus on yoga classes. This is where I realised that the saying “the best exercise is the exercise you’ll actually do” really is true. At this point in my life I had a busy, stressful day job in the mental health industry but I would almost always find the time and energy to go to yoga after work, when it came to the gym I’d always found excuses. Nothing against gyms, if you love them, go for it, if not, try something else that you’ll be motivated to do. There really is so much out there.  For a while, I was completely obsessed with strong vinyasa yoga classes, and yes, my body did start to change. Somewhat to my surprise, so did my mind. I was calmer and more resilient, better able to regulate my emotions and deal with life’s challenges. Making healthier choices about what I ate and drank came more naturally to me. So I started doing some of the more meditative classes on offer at the yoga studio and attending workshops and courses.  By this point the version of me who reacted to perceived ‘failures’ with self-directed anger and disappointment was disappearing, to be replaced with a more compassionate and curious approach to my self-care. It had become a learning journey; not only about what practices worked for me but also a gradual revelation of my authentic self. Yep. It took me until my mid 40s to really start to get an inking of who I am and how I wanted to live my life. Better late than never!  Fast forward a couple of years and I did my first yoga teacher training in Hatha Vinyasa yoga. As it does for so many people, my motivation to teach yoga was connected to my desire share this wonderful mindbody practice so that others could benefit as I had. Of course, the more I learnt the more I realised I needed to learn, so a year on I completed further education in Biomedical yoga teaching.  So there I was, still working my day job in mental health services and pursuing my yoga teaching dreams in the evenings when COVID19 and the subsequent lockdowns catapulted the world into a different space and pared life back to the bare essentials. I was living with my ex-partner, the relationship had not exactly flourished and we made the decision to split up during lockdown. We did manage to handle the situation reasonably well and the fact that the house was large enough for us to both live mostly within our own spaces certainly helped. Still, the situation was an exercise in patience and resilience.     It was at this time that I started to question the wisdom of a strong vinyasa yoga practice being my only source of exercise. Don’t get me wrong, my love of yoga (of which the physical practice is only one eighth) had not diminished, it was more that my body felt like it needed something else, as well as, so to speak. One of the most wonderful things yoga does is teach us to listen to our bodies through enhancing the mind body connection.  Enter my interest in Pilates, weights and the more restorative styles of yoga. Yep, I became one of the many ordering dumbbells, bands and various other types of exercise equipment during lockdown. And, because when I get interested in something I get really interested, I went on to complete a Mat Pilates teacher certification. I proceeded to develop an integrated workout that included yoga, Pilates and weights and with consistent practice I now have a fitter physique in my 50s than at any other time in my adult life.  Along with adding other physical modalities to my workouts, I have continued to nurture my mind through Yin Yoga, meditation, pranayama (breathwork) and journaling practices; rituals I now view as essential supports for my wellbeing. Through my work in the mental health industry and the yoga space I have increasingly found myself coaching people (both one-on-one or in group settings). This process happened almost organically and I find the work to be incredibly fulfilling. Empowering people to create positive shifts in themselves and their lives is something I am absolutely passionate about, so I took the next (obvious) step and completed a Life Coaching certification.  Which just about brings us up to the present day. At age 52 I am happy, healthy, 100% unapologetically me and living my best life ever. I've turned dreams that I once thought were only of the ‘pipe’ variety into goals and worked them to reality, and continue to do so. My journey to mental and physical wellbeing has been key, the learning along the way, building my resilience and finding the balance that works for me.  Like all journeys it is ongoing, but I now have a wealth of knowledge, tools, and self-awareness to support me to adapt my practices to my evolving needs. Mind body wellness, self-insight and clarity has empowered me to let go of fear and step into my authenticity and thrive. I am now privileged and honoured to support others on their journey to living their best life yet.  Clare xxx

Also known as adaptive yoga - accessible yoga is all about creating a yoga practice that is appropriate for people with a disability or mobility issues. Accessible yoga may involve utilising chairs, bolsters and other props to ensure a practice that is appropriate, safe and respectful of physical limitations. Aqua yoga is increasingly becoming one of my favourite methods of providing an accessible yoga practice. The water naturally supports joints allowing clients to explore their range of movement and practice balance poses with a far more safely than on solid ground. People with mobility issues often find aqua yoga to be an uplifting experience as they can explore mindful movements with a greater sense of freedom and curiosity without the fear of falling. And best of all, it's great fun! Contact me if you'd like to explore aqua yoga, chair yoga or other adaptive yoga methods. I can tailor a session private class based on individual preferences and abilities and may also be booked for group classes. Because yoga really is for 'every body'. Clare x

Lately I’ve been pondering how our thoughts create our reality and, of course, the good old law of attraction. Since emerging from the pandemic lockdowns my life has been going through an amazing, dynamic and creative phase. I have stopped shelving dreams, stepped out of my comfort zone and made a lot of changes. I am probably happier with myself and my life now, than I have ever been!  At the same time, I am aware that the decisions I make now about what I choose to focus on, and where I direct my energy, will shape my future for  years to come. If anything, I have way too many options. I feel like I’ve fallen into one of those ‘choose your own adventure’ books that were around in the 1980s. Scary much? I’m f***ing terrified. So yes. I’m certainly endeavouring to be mindful of my thoughts (if not, my language). When it comes to how our thoughts create our reality, modern psychology often works with the cognitive behavioural triangle - essentially a cyclical model of how our thoughts influence our behaviours, which influence our emotions which, in turn influence out thoughts, and so on. At the simplest level, Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) involves working with someone over a period of time to change the thoughts and behaviours that are enhancing negative emotional states. Different strategies and tools may be used, however the length of time a person engages in CBT tend to depend on how embedded, or hardwired, those thoughts are. How deeply those thoughts have become beliefs.  Jennice Vilhauer explains that when we think certain thoughts over and over, they become beliefs, hardwired into our own  truth. And our truth, is our reality. Consider the following excerpt: “…the brain's selective filtering system, often referred to as  priming , works on an activation/inhibition model, when the brain is primed by a certain belief to look for something, it shuts down competing  neural  networks, so you actually have a hard time seeing evidence to the contrary of an already existing belief. That’s why people who are depressed see a more depressing world. It’s also why you are so convinced that your view of the world is the “truth.” What most people don’t realise is they are participating in creating their own version of the truth.” Reference: https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/living-forward/202009/how-your-thinking-creates-your-reality So basically, over time our thoughts - that inform our beliefs - are actually changing our neural networks. This affects everything we view as “reality”… our self-concept, how we perceive our environment, our expectations and what we believe to be possible. When considering that everything from our day to day actions to our big life decisions and ambitions is based on what we view as reality, the value of learning to watch our thoughts - and make adjustments as needed - is clear. The challenge is in the ‘how’. Fortunately, over time we can change our neural networks, effectively re-wiring our brains. The first step is to simply become aware of the power of our thoughts and the role they play in writing the story that is our life.  Journaling and meditation are great tools for developing the skill of watching our thoughts. I’ve personally found a regular practice of free-flow writing to be particularly useful - simply allow your thoughts to spill out onto the page… don’t worry about grammar or punctuation don’t, well, overthink it. At times it can be surprising what your mind dumps on the page, and triggering, but it provides a starting point for cultivating awareness of thoughts that are not aligned to the life you want to be living… and the greater your awareness, the more empowered you are to challenge thought-patterns, and beliefs, that are not working for you.  Clare xxx